Child
abuse is never an easy topic to discuss for those who have either been a victim
or an abuser. As a society, we publicly abhor child abuse, but also tend to
close doors on it, hoping it will go away. Discussions over cups of coffee do
not have an impact. Sorry, they don’t. Changing mindsets requires action, not
idle chitchat.
I
grew up in a time when abuse wasn’t discussed, when few people wanted to acknowledge
it existed. Schools and churches weren’t havens. I know. I tried.
My
story doesn’t come close to those children who have suffered broken bones, hot
grease thrown on them, and death. Nonetheless, I’ve been there and carry the
emotional scars, as well as a disfigured knuckle.
The
first incident I remember, I was five. I’d been sledding, hit a post and cut my
lip. My usual punishment for doing something wrong was my father’s belt on my
bare bottom. This time, he used the buckle end. The next day, he took a metal
pancake turner to me because I couldn’t sit on the welts and cuts. I became convinced
I was a horrible child and deserved whatever was done to me. I tried and tried
to be good, but always failed. He once slammed the car door on my hand to prove
to me how bad I was. While in grade school, I did something that angered him
during a party at our house. He took me to the basement and pummeled me with
his fists. Each time I cried out, he hit me harder. He hit me until I quit
begging him to stop. That took a long time. He left me cowering and bleeding,
wedged between the washer and dryer. The next day I had to move all the snow
from one side of the yard to the other and back again. We lived in South Dakota
then. There was a lot of snow.
The
abuse wasn’t centered on me. I couldn’t help my mother when he hit her. When my
brother and sister were born, I could take the hits intended for them, and did.
As a teen, I started to work out on weights. I got into fights, learning from
those who could better me. The day finally came when I had the confidence and
ability to step between my parents. That was the last time he hit my mother. They
divorced shortly after that.
As
with most abused children, I loved my father and only wanted his approval,
though I never could do enough to receive it. Even when I enlisted in the army,
he scoffed. Finally, when I volunteered to become an EOD (Explosive Ordinance
Disposal [the bomb squad]) specialist and worked with the Secret Service and
State Department, his attitude began to change. When I entered law enforcement,
he actually told me has proud of me. It was one of the happiest moments of my
life. We slowly built the relationship I’d only been able to dream of having
with him. He was killed in a car crash a few years later.
I
was and am extremely proud of my father’s professional achievements. He was
abused, passed off to relatives, and dropped out of school. He refused to be
less than he could be, and climbed up the ranks to become the Labor Relations Officer
for a major railroad. After that, he joined the National Transportation Safety
Board until his full retirement.
I
don’t fully hold him to blame. He didn’t have any experience beyond the abuse
he suffered under. In his mind, that’s how fathers acted.
One
day, when we were enjoying some time just being together, he suddenly said he
was sorry.
We
both cried. He loved and cherished my sons, providing them with fond memories
of their grandfather, and for that, I will always be grateful.
I
am honored to post this announcement of what a group of authors have gathered
to do in the struggle against child abuse.
I
won’t be posting anything else on this blog for the next week. If you have a
story to tell, feel free to share it, by name or anonymously. I’m not a doctor,
therapist, or anything other than someone who will listen.
If you need an ear or
an understanding shoulder, I’m here.
Cedar City, UT, June 14th, 2012- Local author J.S. Wayne has long wanted to take direct action to help survivors of child abuse. In August of last year, he discovered a way when he founded Writing Out Child Abuse (WOCA), a collaborative charitable effort among authors, literary agents, and other publishing-industry professionals united by one common cause: To provide comfort, aid, safety, and hope to survivors of child abuse, both locally and worldwide.
As WOCA’s inaugural fundraising effort, he brought together authors from a broad range of backgrounds and genres with a submissions call for an anthology. These authors were given some simple parameters: Child abuse had to be the central conflict or motivation in the story and could not be portrayed in a positive light, and the abusers had to pay for their crimes. In due course, Laurie Sanders, editor in chief of Black Velvet Seductions Publishing, expressed an interest in assistingWOCA in publishing the work in progress.
The result is A Light In The Darkness, a WOCAcharity anthology to benefit child abuse prevention and intervention initiatives around the world. Containing stories ranging from historical paranormal fiction to gritty urban fantasy to ripped-from-the-headlines realism, this anthology demonstrates the emotional and physical scars child abuse leaves and the chilling reality of the damage child abuse leaves in its wake. At the same time, every story ends on a hopeful note, a reminder that people can choose to be more than what their environment and circumstances conspired to make them.
Mr. Wayne, the anthology editor, states: “I’m very humbled and honored to have had such talented authors answer the call for this anthology and the cause it represents. As a child abuse survivor myself, I felt that turning my talents to a cause that would help children in my situation and worse was a logical decision. I’m very grateful to Laurie Sanders at Black Velvet Seductions and all the authors who pitched in for this project. It’s a pleasure to have edited and worked with such amazing authors in the service of helping children.”
J.S. Wayne is best known as an author of paranormal erotic romance, and is a multi-published author with Noble Romance Publishing, LLC with numerous poems, short stories, anthologies, and novellas and novels to his credit. Joining him in A Light In The Darknessare Amber Green, Gillian Colbert, and R. Renee Vickers, all established authors, and newcomers Eric Keys and Phoebe Valois.
Mr. Wayne has pledged to divide fifty percent of author proceeds from his first novel, Shadowphoenix: Requiem, between WOCA and local child abuse prevention and intervention charities, as well as twenty percent of author proceeds from his entire backlist of available works.
About Writing Out Child Abuse
J.S. Wayne conceived of Writing Out Child Abuse after reading a pair of horrifying true-life child abuse stories. Since its inception in August of 2011, WOCA has attracted numerous authors and publishing-industry professionals who all share a common goal: To bring comfort, aid, safety, and hope to survivors of child abuse worldwide. For more information about WOCA or the authors involved, visit their website at http://wix.com/writingoutchildabuse/intro.
Blurb:
In A Light in the Darkness, the inaugural anthology
from the authors of WOCA, a dark world awaits you.
Spanning centuries of time, encircling the globe, and
running the gamut from eerie historical fiction to gritty
urban fantasy to page-scorching erotic romance, these
authors unflinchingly dissect the horror of child abuse
in all its forms. These authors have taken great pains to
ensure the innocent are assured justice and the guilty
pay for their crimes in the unique fantasy worlds they
have created. Sadly, in real life, this is not always the case.
This book contains scenes of graphic violence and
honest depictions of child abuse. Readers who may
find such material unduly disturbing, objectionable, or
“triggering” are strongly advised not to read it.
Some of the newest and hottest names in fiction have
lent their talents to this collection, including Gillian
Colbert, Amber Green, R. Renee Vickers, Eric Keys,
Phoebe Valois, and J.S. Wayne. All of these authors are
united by one core belief, and with this collection, they
seek to turn their talents to a greater good.
One hundred percent of all proceeds from this
collection are being donated directly to Writing Out
Child Abuse. These proceeds will then be dispersed to
charities whose sole aim is to help survivors of child
abuse all over the globe. To learn more about WOCA or
their fund-raising activities, or to get involved yourself,
visit http://wix.com/writingoutchildabuse/introhttps://www.smashwords.com/books/view/170707
Thank you so much for sharing, David.
ReplyDeleteOne of my earliest memories is kneeling on a concrete floor in a basement while a trio of high-school kids surrounded me and alternately cajoled and threatened me to do something no three-year-old should EVER do. I remember their names, their faces, and the laughter as I did what they told me to. After all, they were older, and wouldn't lie to me, right?
The bastards.
Ironically, this happened to me in Rapid City, South Dakota, on East Jackson Street. The perps are dead now, and good riddance. At least I can say I got to piss on their graves. So many of us are not so fortunate.
Thank you for telling your tale, David. I wish to God none of us had such stories. It takes a lot of courage to stand against that kind of darkness, and I'm glad at least one finally had a happy ending.
Everyone deserves a happy ending, JS
ReplyDeleteThat's why what you're doing is so important.
Indeed. Indeed. Fight the good fight JS!
ReplyDeleteHello, KB. Thanks for dropping by.
ReplyDeleteThank you, KB.
ReplyDeleteThis is a bitter fight for me, mostly because it even HAS to be fought. These stories are regrettably commonplace (moreso than I ever realized, statistics notwithstanding) and I take every one I hear just as personally as if it had happened to me directly.
As Jesus says in the Bible, "Whatsoever thou doest to the least of these, thou doest also to me."
I know even with my best efforts I'll probably never change the world, but at least I can try to spread a little hope around as I pass through. That, to my mind, is something worth leaving behind.
Thanks for stopping by, KB!
Hi David, I read this the other night but didn't comment then...it was late and I was choked up...I probably would have written something mushy.
ReplyDeleteI have no words could do justice to your personal story, and recounting your experiences does more for this cause than a work of fiction could. What I took most out of your history is your incredible perseverance and depth of compassion to be able to forgive your father even after all of that. One of the hardest things in life is recognizing the failings of your parents and then working to not repeat them, but harder still is forgiveness for their inability to do that with their lives.
op, getting mushy. Ok that's all I have to say other than thank you for shining a huge spotlight on this project.
Thanks to all of you, Renee, for taking an active role in this project. Believe me, it's my pleasure to provide a modest space for your efforts.
ReplyDeleteAnother outstanding post. This anthology is a wonderful project that deserves as much promo as it can to bring to light ugliness that exists for 'our' children.
ReplyDeleteThanks David for sharing. Thanks JS and all the WOCA authors for taking on this huge project for the benefit of the ones who need it.
Thanks for your support, Judith. We appreciate it very much.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much, Judith! :)
ReplyDeleteI can honestly say this has been the most challenging and rewarding project I've done to date, and it's more than been worth every curse, every tear, and every sleepless night I passed working on it. If I can look back at the end of my life and say I did one truly honorable, good, noble thing to no personal benefit, I'm perfectly okay if this is that one thing.
So, uh...you're gonna sub something for the next call. Right? ;) (Totally kidding, but you know I'd love to have you on board. :) )
I didn't experience child abuse, but in my blended and extended family, too many of them did. The invisible scars are the hardest to heal.
ReplyDeleteJ.S., you are doing something wonderful for the abused kids and subsequent adults out there. David, you are wonderful, as always.
(((Kate)))
ReplyDeleteI will always believe that even one is two too many. Those scars never truly go away, but some people learn to deal with them and turn them to a productive end and some don't. You can often tell who the latter are: They're the ones who are in and out of prison, the ones who make tearful apologies the day after and say "Never again..." until the next time, or the ones who have CPS at the door twice a week.
We, as adults, have an obligation to stand up and say "Not on our watch." Because if we don't, who WILL?
Thanks for dropping by, Kate!
Exactly. Who will?
ReplyDelete